Welcome
This website serves as a hub for my crappy creative output
I make stuff to entertain myself
I apologise in advance
Just scroll
Sean
Front Cover

EP FRONT

EP BACK

Note:EP in progress. Song titles are placeholders only.
Torpedo Solutions (DEMO)  mp3 preview online below:
All My Plants Are Dying ( DEMO)  mp3 preview online below:
Master Mouth  (DEMO)  mp3 preview online below:
The Classic EP
2017
I don't give a fuck about your ears lol
Six tracks of shit. 
Listen below:
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The 'Satin' Dialect HOSE-UPS Telecaster:
A shitty Chinese knock off styled guitar right down to the misspelled brand name and shameless rip off logo.
Inspired by 90's skate culture and retro arcade games. The clear inspiration being Jeremy Kleins HOOK-UPS skateboards and Capcoms Street Fighter 3.
Telecaster w/ chopper T humbucker, half strung bigsby tremolo, anime girl pick-guard
This guitar was single pickup, single master volume for most of its life. I recently heard about something called a 'tone knob' which is apparently quite popular amongst guitar players. The addition of a tone knob has added nothing to my life, nor has my guitar playing improved. 
Yeah
Historical versions of the instrument:
Fat Switch Tele - circa 2014
Fat Switch Tele - circa 2014
Sticker Tele - circa 2015
Sticker Tele - circa 2015
Relic Tele - circa 2017
Relic Tele - circa 2017
Perfect Tele - circa  2018
Perfect Tele - circa 2018
Custom Electronics and Ramblings:
The guitar now features a new signal flow with an improved control layout.
Why? The doctor says 'Sean your are actually  insane', thanks again doc
The pickup can now be split using my new coil split sweep pot which gradually shifts the pickup from a hum bucker to a single coil as you rotate the pot. This is the white knob in the below image.
Excellent.
Master Volume  (yellow knob) and Tone (green knob) have been retained but I have now added a switch which when engaged ignores both the volume and tone settings and instead routes the pickup straight to the output jack. The purpose of this switch dubbed 'The Maximum' is simply to provide a way to get maximum output volume and tone without losing the settings dialled in via the pots. The coil split sweep pot is not ignored and can still be used in this mode for tone adjustment.
Most excellent.
For those interested the yellow wire connecting to the bridge is the ground wire.
Why? because it looks cool, obviously, don't ask stupid questions
Additionally this guitar is set up for C G C F A C tuning using Ernie Ball Mammoth Slinky strings 62-48-34-24w-16-12.
Why? because using ridiculous strings and low tunings allows me to claim I am somehow cooler and better than 'those losers in e standard'. Nine gauge? go fuck yourself. I wouldn't even allow my dog to play strings like that. You'll catch me playing the fucken ukulele before subjecting myself to such a pathetic existence. etc etc etc
My playing style can be accurately described as: guy who plays bluesy bullshit on piano attempts to play guitar and suck ass at it.
The electronics in this guitar are very straight forward and I can provide a wiring guide for anyone who might like to run similar electronics in a 1 pickup hum bucker guitar configuration.
Why the single pickup?  
A: I always loved the look of 'esquire' style telecasters. 
Also I can say things like: "Wow you need two pickups to play? what a fucken loser!"
B: If you're not using a neck pickup there is no point leaving it in there. Remember a neck pickup is a magnet after all and your strings are made of metal.
Also you can shove cool shit in the empty pickup route. Shout out to Phil X. That dude rocks. 
Why the half strung bigsby?
This allows trem arm movement to only effect the 3 high strings. The 3 low strings remain solid. This is great if you are playing Kevin Shields style shit and strumming with the trem arm in your hand. My bigsby has been modified to allow the arm to move 360 degrees. The other reason for the half stringing is so the 3 low strings go into the body of the guitar and transmit string vibration into the wood. The vibration of the wood then goes back into the bridge saddles, through the strings and excites the magnetic field of the pickup. This allows the wood to impart a certain characteristic into your guitar tone. 
Yes 'tone wood' is real.....
Trivia: This guitar has been routinely  used as a sledgehammer to destroy various inanimate object. Tables, chairs etc. Somehow the neck remains intact despite becoming detached on various occasions. 
Why? It's a lifestyle choice. I don't tell you how to fuck your wife, don't tell me how to play my guitar.
RETRO REV is an arcade platform that I have been building to emulate the experience of an old skool arcade machine. 
The idea was to create a no bullshit machine where you turn the cunt on, it plays a splash screen and boots straight into whatever game is loaded onto it. Chuck a token into the coin slot and you are good to go. 
Pure old skool!
I've seen lots of people building similar things online that emulate tons of game systems, have online play, have fancy UI's for selecting games and all other manner of fuckery. 
This all leaves me thinking: "If  you want some fancy media centre bullshit you  might as well just buy an arcade joystick and sit on the couch playing playstation with it ".
While my machine does feature the ability to plug in a gaming controller for p2 it is essentially pure arcade goodness and nothing else.
Below you can see some concept art, and the rough shape that the machine is currently in.
Software is 100% complete.
Electronics are 90-95% complete.
Wood cabinet is cool but is very much a work in progress.​​​​​​​
Okay so below is the button for the arcade where I am posting all my crappy games. I have password protected it because I am aware that despite meaning well I can certainty come off as offensive to people.
 I genuinely like most people (even the ones that I don't like) and I would prefer not to upset anybody at all if I can help it. 
If you want access just ask and I'll check to see that you are not a fucken puss....ah.....I mean I'll check that you're not a cunt.